So…

After an amazingly refreshing short trip to Tirupati Balaji over the weekend, I am back in Bangalore, trying hard to breathe in the smoky air. The trip was great; beautiful surrounding, my parents, long drives, quiet atmosphere, simple food, lots of pics, lots of time to sit back and relax and think of life… It was awesome.

I have never visited more temples in the span of 2 days. Within 2 days, I travelled from Karnataka to Tamil Nadu to Andhra Pradesh, back to Tamil Nadu and finally in Karnataka. It was fun. The stations were so small and cute, like they just came out of those paintings. It was green and clean and so simple. I loved it there.

Last year this day, I met Anu for the last time. I am wearing her big green sweater today. The sweater is knee length and is big enough to cover 2 more people like me. It’s Anu’s. Period.

Just when I thought the blue skies were back, I got sucked into the black hole once again. I don’t know what’s wrong with me!! Seasonal depression? Maybe.

My roomie is back. She wants our room to look “Christmassssieee”. Okay then! So we have red and green dupattas hanging from our windows, a red and golden bag on my cupboard, red and green stick-ons on the walls and Christmas cards floating around. hmmm. I got Christmas gifts yesterday- a *very* cute santa cap, cards, ear rings and a Dirty Dancing vcd!! Yay!

So, I am going to be on leave from tomorrow till the 1 of Jan. Got exams! I don’t even know if I have all the notes.

I hate ‘hope’. It keeps you going. You keep running after something which you know you will never get. You waste your time, energy, emotions knowingly because you ‘hope’. Life is a bitch, no doubt about that but ‘hope’ is a undeniably a bigger bitch!

Song? ‘Kabhi khud pe kabhi haalaat pe rona aaya’ from some Dev Anand flick.

State of mind? Stuck.

* Those who follow my blog daily, I am going to be back only by the 2 of Jan. On leave for exams!

Be good…

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!!!

hmm

“There’s no sensation compared with this
Suspended animation, a state of bliss
Can’t keep my mind from the circling skies
Tongue-tied and twisted just an earthbound misfit, I…”
                           Pink Floyd
               (A Momentary Lapse of Reason)

You know you are right…

I will never bother you
I will never promise to
I will never follow you
I will never bother you

Never speak a word again
I will crawl away for good

I will move away from here
You won’t be afraid of fear
No thought was put into this
I always knew it would come to this

Things have never been so swell
I have never failed to fail

Pain
You know you’re right … 

I’m so warm and calm inside
I no longer have to hide
Let’s talk about someone else
Steaming soup begins to melt

Nothing really bothers her
She just wants to love himself
I will move away from here
You won’t be afraid of fear
No thought was put into this
I always knew it would come to this

Things have never been so swell
I have never failed to fail

Pain
You know you’re right…    

 

 Awesome…

 Wow…

 Hmmm…

 …

 mmm…

 aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

 O-o-k-a-y…

 hmmmmmm

These are the moments when you should just shut up and watch… I have nothing to say!!!

blueskiesareback

Before anything else, my gothic name is “Withered Waste”.

Moving on…

According to Tasnim Aslam, the foreign office spokesperson, Pakistan never claimed Kashmir to be an integral part of Pakistan. They just want Kashmiris to choose their own future and they only hope  that they choose Pakistan. Oh really now?   

Started reading Anita Pratap’s Island of Blood. I love the way she writes. Her writing is simple and descriptive which makes the book a very interesting read.  There are times when I feel that she is actually talking to me through her book. Nice. The book though, is kinda depressing… I haven’t finished it yet…let’s see how it goes…

I am in a super-good mood today. I mean I don’t really have a reason to be so happy but I just am.

Infosys first Indian company in Nasdaq-100!! Uhm, they have a market capital of 1,20,000 crore! Wow…

6 golds, 15 silvers and 17 bronze medals in the Asian games! Yay! Yay! Yay!

Song? ‘I can’t help falling in love with you’, Michael Buble’s version.

State of mind? Playful

Weather? Bright sunny day! Nothings grey! (that rhymes..me a great poet now!)

Suddenly everything has life. It’s like I have been thrown down from a black hole on to this beautiful place where I stand in the center with this shimmering light on me. Wow!!

At the end of the day it’s all good.

Trust me, to move on is life…

Oh well… 

*a choco-block from Corner House after yummy biryani is the best thing that can happen to anyone; happened to me- Yay!!!

pnikflyod

I LOVE FLOYD 

We are two souls swimming in a fish bowl, year after year… 

Running over the same old ground, what have we found?

 The same old fears…

Wish you were here…

Syd Barret came up with the name “Pink Floyd” after two blues  musicians namely Pink Anderson and Floyd Council. Uhm, rhythm and blues? An amalgamation of jazz, blues and gospel, R&B is a super-popular genre of music. But somehow, I can’t relate Floyd to any of it. Floyd is all about psychedelic rock and nothing else.

So, when Barret decided to go high on LSD each time he had to perform on stage and screw up the entire concert, it was pretty obvious that the rest of the band would not go on like that. David Gilmour( he is hottt!) replaced him but with time Rodger Waters became the lead singer of Pink Floyd.

Floyd gives you a high, a mind-altering experience. The music is awesome, the lyrics crazy. Nick Mason’s drums give a psychic rhythm to your movements, Rick Wright’s magic on the wind instrument gives you a f***** high and David Gilmour’s voice is just something else man… Not that I don’t like Rodger Waters’ voice, but Gilmour is something else.

 I would do anything for one Floyd concert, anything. I would kill to listen to them play “marooned”, “coming back to life”, “learning to fly”, “comfortably numb” and “sorrow”. My favourite songs. Thanks to Floyd, I don’t need weed or LSD to get a high; they successfully pass on their high to me:p

One thing I love about Floyd is their cover art. It’s awesome, very trippy; all of them. 

If you can get your hands on this book on The Dark Side of The Moon, you should spend atleast an hour reading about the band and the kind of stuff they did. I sat in Landmark for an hour the other day going through the book. Awesome. You should also read Nick Mason’s book on Pink Floyd; lots of pictures, quotes and information about these guys you will never find otherwise.

Music is the best gift to mankind. Wow. Each time I wanna submerge in something so deep that I never come out of it, music helps me sail through.

Anyway, Pink Floyd does not plan on reuniting. Don’t know why would they want to do something like that to their fans. 14 albums, super-great songs, a never-dying impression on the minds of millions and then suddenly a split. No more albums after 1994’s The Division Bell. I don’t think Waters and Gilmour will ever clear out their differences but I still hope that they hold one more concert… But then, hope is nothing but a bitch…

Oh well…

ixmudep

Mohammad Afzal has been sentenced to death for the Parliament attack. Good thing? Maybe. How do you compensate such a loss? Will killing him help? Will all the people who died in the terror attack be brought back to life? I don’t know…

What do you do when your friends start feeling that you have changed? What do you do when you want to hide from the entire world? How do you crawl back into your shell, protected and safe in your own small world? Why is being happy such an important thing? We are all human beings, we cannot be in a constant state of mind/emotion/mood. There are good days and the bad ones and the really bad ones. You can’t be happy all the time!

I have been low on life; certain things have been bothering me for a while now. Life does not go the way you want it to go. It takes sudden turns and curves. You are unprepared but you gotta stick it out. Nothing is larger than life; no joy, no sorrow, no pain, no emotion is bigger than life itself. Life consumes us anyway, why not give in with a smile? At the end of the day, nothing matters…nothing… It’s all a crazy plan of the dude sitting up there. He enjoys it. He laughs at us. A sorrowful blow to your face and you are dead. Living but dead.

You plan and hope and wish and look forward to things just to be told that the path has been blocked;blocked for a very long time. Ultimately, you do give in…you don’t have much of a choice you know.

Abhishek Bacchan marrying Aishwarya Rai? Naah… Not happening!!!

Song? “Coming back to life”, Pink Floyd

State of mind? “- – -”

Weather? Warm, cloudy, gloomy

let go…

blah#5

            Ruzbeh N. Bharucha’s “Yamuna Gently Weeps” is a book about how the demolition of Yamuna Pushta slums has anhilated 40,000 homes leaving around 1,50,000 people without a shelter, depriving them of the basic necessities and changing their lives- for the worse- forever.

The book has thick, *very* good quality paper and smells like fresh ink spilled on paper. There are interviews, quotes, pictures and his own perception and analysis of the entire issue. There are pictures of young kids looking for coins in a dirty drain, of remains of the destroyed life of these helpless people and of the Yamuna which now looks like a drain. He talks about how political parties have swindled these people and why nothing is being done to improve their situation.

If you are thinking that I liked the book, then you are wrong.

 The book is too heavy to carry, has depressing pictures of malnutritioned children, hungry and deserted old people and helpless and hopeless men and women, and is a very dull read. Also, I don’t like the title of the book at all. I don’t understand what he is trying to say.  I mean, maybe he is a brilliant writer and his book might win the Booker next year but I just didn’t like it.

I began my day with reading something that my friend’s friend wrote for her friend who died in an accident last week. It was so sad that I started crying… Life and Death. It’s all so twisted. In a minute, the person is referred to as “the body”. Everything just gets over in a wink of the eye. There is a sudden abyss of void that can never be filled again. hmmm…

Song? ‘Sorrow’, Pink Floyd

State of mind? Calm, introspective.

Weather? Cold. Grey.

Oh well…

blah#4

I have time and I am very sleepy. So, I have decided to write this post.

 I dont know what am I going to write given the fact that I cant even keep my eyes open but I shall try. I will try to write about something that I can write when I am half asleep. Like a dizzy dream, or melting chocklate, or maybe that half conversation which was left incomplete ages ago… Or it could be like those lines of the letter that got washed away by tears…or maybe the unheard part of that lullaby that your mum sang to you when you were burning up with fever…

 It could be like the empty bottle of wine that still lies in the corner of ur room…or maybe the incomplete dream that left you unsettled…could be like that undefined relationship which never really existed…Like the fractional glimpse of that super-hot guy you saw crossing the road the other day…

Losing track. Losing track. Losing track.

cold, dry weather.

“Navjot Singh Sidhu, former cricketer, commentator, popular TV talk show host and former MP, on Wednesday reached the Punjab and Haryana High Court for a crucial hearing that will determine the quantum of punishment to be awarded to him…”  He has been convicted for causing the death of a 65-year-old man, 18 years ago. 18 years? Okay then! I am not going to comment on that now.

 A friend of mine lost a friend in an accident. Road rage. Hmmm.

I slept at 5:30 today. Got up at 8:15. Decided to stay in bed but obviously ended up here in office. This is bad; I am getting addicted to my work. I don’t like addictions. Addictions ruin you. Why else would sensible people continue smoking even though every ciggarate pack says  “Smoking is injurious to health”.  They are definitetly not foolish, they are *majorly* addicted. I feel sorry for them.

Oh, this is interesting. I was reading up about OCD(Obsessive Compulsary Disorder) and it’s creepy that I can relate to most of the symptoms. Like, arranging everything in groups of two or three, repeated hand-washing, counting steps, perfectly aligning  objects at complete, absolute right angles, a need for both sides of the body to feel even etc. LOL!

When I read a psychology book, I thought I was suffering from every disorder… Human beings… Too funny…

Song? ‘Sounds of silence’, Simon and Garfunkel. Awesome.

State of mind? Occupied. Chaotic too.

Weather? Dry. Cold. Not so nice.

I am missing home today:(

Oh well…